How we make sure we treat our friends well?

Being a good mate can be hard work especially when they do your head in! You have to be unselfish and understanding.

“I’ve known my best friend since we were babies but recently things have changed between us. She’s in a different form and has been hanging out with a group of kids who I don’t really like. She acts funny with me when she’s around them and says mean things to me to make them laugh. I’ve had about enough. I don’t want to lose her friendship but she obviously wants them to like her more than me so I’ve stopped waiting for her to walk home.”

Kayleigh, 14

If you start going out with someone your friends may feel a bit excluded – let them know that you still want to spend time with them.

Try not to compete with your friends – good friendships are about supporting each other.

Peer pressure is when people are made to do what other members of a group do. Sometimes peer pressure is harmless and a part of growing up but sometimes it makes you do things you know aren’t right. If this happens it’s time to stop.

Everyone wants to be accepted but you also want to be liked for who you are and what you think.

Not every friendship is built to last. Sometimes people just grow apart.

Being gay

Just because you like or fancy someone of the same sex, it doesn’t mean you’re gay but if you think you might be gay, try following this advice and remember you’re not alone and there are lots of other people like you.

People at gay helplines will help you find out more about gay life and meet other gay people of your own age.

Don’t go rushing off to your local gay scene to find support. Why not go to a youth group instead to help you meet people the same age and in the same situation as yourself.

I think I might be gay but I’m too afraid to tell anyone

Don’t worry! Take your time. You don’t have to make decisions yet.

Choose someone you feel safe with to tell. It’s not always a good idea to tell all your friends until you’re sure. Why?????? Nobody can guarantee people’s reactions and they might surprise you in a good way or in a bad way.

You don’t have to tell anyone you’re gay if you don’t want to, but if you want to live happily and openly as a gay person its good to talk to people who are gay through a helpline.

Don’t feel that you have to have sex at this time just to prove if you’re gay or not – take your time. It is better to wait to have sex until you’re in a supportive relationship.

Will people treat me differently? What support groups can I go to?

A lot of people are totally cool with gay people and don’t make a big deal out of it. But some people don’t understand or accept it because of ignorance.

Often your parents will be the most difficult people to tell. So give yourself a break and tell someone else. It can be someone you know either a close friend or relative, or someone you don’t know at a support group. But be prepared that people may surprise or disappoint you with their reaction.

Just remember you are who you are and there’s nothing wrong with that. You’re not alone and there are lots of people who feel like you do.

Click on this link to find out more about  Young People's Support Service's counselling service for young people (link opens in a new window).

London Lesbian & Gay Switchboard helpline is for people across the UK. Call 020 7837 7324 or text 020 7689 8501.

Stonewall (Gay, Lesbian & Bisexual) helpine: 08000 50 20 20

The SHOUT group is for young lesbian, gay and bisexual people In Hull aged between 14 and 25. It meets once a week in the evening for different activities and an excellent supportive atmosphere. Call (01482) 218115 for more details.